Burned Out

Have you ever experienced a complete burn out? Where you can’t think anymore? Your brain feels like you can’t hold any more information? You have no motivation to continue on? Nothing is enjoyable anymore? Basically, you are done. Just can’t do anymore. Physically, mentally, spiritually…

I have. I am going through one…again.

This will be my second burn-out in 3 years. I am doing too much. No down time, just work. Different types of work though: Day job, home life, owning a business, and managing my own well being. I am so happy I don’t have kids, because they would starve right now. It feels like no matter how productive I am, I just can’t keep up. Just too much work. Stupid work, stupid money, stupid stress – all those things prevent us from doing what we want to do.

Blurry rocks

A picture of some rocks I found outside of my office

Sometimes, I just want a day where I can curl up in a corner and just not do a single thing. And when I do decide to come out of my cave, the world has kindly stopped for me, so I don’t have any catching up to do. Weekends are filled with paperwork and ‘catching up’ for things I didn’t have time for during the week. Like housework, bills, and paperwork for my business. Vacations aren’t vacations at all. They are just approved procrastination days. So that when I come back, I am bombarded with fires, and mountains of tasks that need to be done.

It’s overwhelming. Yes, I have PTO that I could use to give myself a much needed down-day. However, I am trying to save that time so I can spend two weeks taking a course to get my dog training certification. It’s an exhausting, dangerous game I am playing. I need a day for my mental health, but refuse to spend one.

On any average day, I usually work about 14 hours. On weekends, I work about 5 hours total. Last week, between my business and my day job, I pulled about a 150hr week. Over the weekend, I worked about 30 hours. Paperwork, finances, actual training, website stuff, updating statuses for my business on Facebook, purchasing new equipment, creating a new Google+ account, studying, organizing, printing, researching, shopping, etc… it doesn’t end. I have been doing this 14-16 hr daily schedule for the last 6 months. And I don’t see an end in sight yet…

I’m overwhelmed. Seems to be a new trend within my life recently… What do you do to relax when this happens?

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3 thoughts on “Burned Out

  1. I am going through the same thing, so don’t feel alone! Between school, work, housework, kids, husband, dogs, it all takes a toll! I am exhausted and really procrastinating on a paper for school as I type this. Generally, I just push through. I have learned not to over volunteer myself for things (like overtime at work), and to give myself permission to have an occasional free couple of hours – even if I have to play catch up later! Right now, I just want a vacation – from all of it!

    • Yes, I don’t have training tomorrow after work, so I’m not doing anything for anyone else tomorrow. Tomorrow is my night!!

  2. I escape totally, by reading or (preferable for me) listening to audio books. Something totally absorbing, that means I am completely distracted from all the day to day drudgery. I find that gives me the best couple of hours to myself, if I can’t be absorbed into another story, I can’t stop my brain thinking about the million things I should be doing ‘right now’. I listen whilst getting ready for work, whilst travelling (I don’t drive, so not a danger) whilst taking the do for a walk, whils doing the cleaning or cooking, in fact whilst doing anything that doesn’t require my detailed attention, but requires my physical presence. This allows me at least some brain space, whilst allowing me to complete tasks which are otherwise dull & daunting, making them enjoyable, and something I actually look forward to! I never thought I would say that of cooking or ironing. 🙂

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